What do I have to do to get your attention?

You can learn a lot watching kids.

One evening we were out shopping, my daughter, her daughter and myself. We were in a shoe store that wasn't terribly busy but the teenage boy who seemed to be running the show that night wasn't terribly interested in two women and a baby. Sophie isn't used to being ignored and she was going out of her way to get the young man's full attention. She talked (just not in a recognizable language), she smiled, she danced, she flirted. The kid barely acknowledged us and didn't engage with Sophie at all. I took the shoes I was purchasing to the register and placed them on the counter and picked Sophie up and set her on the counter too. Sophie kept on flirting with the young man and finally he took a little step toward engaging with her. As we turned to leave he spoke to Sophie and said "Good-bye." After all that work to get him to acknowledge her she turned to look at him and blew the biggest raspberry of all time. He was quite surprised and I was rushing us out the door so he wouldn't hear my laughter.

It got me to thinking though. I say I have a message to share and I want to live my life so that message is clear. Have I ever negated the message by a carelessly word, a frown or just completely missing someone in my path?

I wonder. 

I am nothing if not consistent

So I write once a year now. 

I know God has given me words.  Why can't I discipline myself to write them down??  SO I try again.

The Birthday Project

I recently came across a blog that described the writer's 38th birthday. She decided she wanted to do 38 random acts of kindness to celebrate the day and enlisted her family in helping do that. She wrote about it and it has exploded into a Facebook page and groups all around the world "going and doing likewise."

I really want to remember this and follow suit. I'll have to enlist all my family to pitch in because I'd otherwise have to take a week to fit in a RAOK for every year of my birth! I'm wondering how to incorporate it into more purposeful living and celebrating every day? I wonder if we could do something like this at Christmas. I just dread the holiday anymore because it's such a financial drain and it ends up being a bunch more crap to find something to do with. Why not take some of that money and put it where it would actually bless people? What kinds of lessons would Sophie learn from watching us do it? Would God be glorified more in that act than in paying too much for another electronic gadget to take the place of last year's electronic gadget?

Striving to be intentional at thanks-living is so against the nature of man. Or woman.

Thanksgiving

Living a life of gratitude is such a challenge. At least in my corner of a very materialistic world, it is way too easy to dwell on what I don't have or how what I do have compares to what others have. Funny thing is I never compare myself or what I have to those who have less. Only those who have much more or much nicer or much newer. Then I feel sad. Discontent. Lacking. Cheated.

You would think my eyes would have been opened (and they were, though apparently not permanently) when I spent time in a far poorer country. Walking the streets of China, riding the train through the countryside I saw poverty. I saw real lack. Even the ones with much have less than I have. I should feel shame and guilt to think for one moment what I have isn't enough. Why it is such a temptation then to feel like life isn't fair because I don't have as nice a house, new a car, great a vacation...? It's one of the devil's most effective snares.

I want to be different. I want to be a blessing. I want to be less burdened by stuff. Free to give of what I have - physically and emotionally - and not worry about what's left. Will I have enough? I serve a God that is Enough. Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. He is Enough. May I have the grace and the strength and the will to remember that and live in this season of Thanksgiving like I believe it.

Another stab at it

It's been a year since I wrote a word.  I lost my voice.  I'm not sure how to find it again but I'm pretty sure not writing a thing isn't going to help the situation.  Much has happened in one year - much that I wish I would have captured for Sophie's sake.  Maybe if nothing else I'll get in the habit of writing down Sophie's sweetness so we won't forget the precious days.

I think Facebook is responsible for the death of a lot of things -- meaningful communication, writing things that are longer than sound bites, getting anything accomplished....yeah, it's bad all right.  I say as I have it open in another window right this minute.  Sigh.

ANYWAY, here we go again.  I'm going to write, I'm going to write, I'm going to write.

Challenge Six

Take a few minutes to call someone you haven't talked to in a while. Tell them how much you appreciate them.

Since this is my deal I can say that this call fits these parameters -- I called Matt this morning! Thanks to the wonders of SKYPE I can call a local number on my cell and reach his cell in Japan. Because he has been without internet access for some time I couldn't stand it any longer --- I wanted to hear my baby's voice! It was so nice to hear him - he sounds like he is doing well and I got to tell him I loved him and missed him and couldn't wait to see him. So now, all is right with my world. :-)

Five

Take five minutes to write about how grateful you for all of the wonderful things that you currently have in your life. Don't long for what you don't possess - instead, take stock of all the blessings you already enjoy.

In no particular order - just stream of consciousness writing (I'm clocking this so I know I go for give whole minutes.) My blessings include: knowing God, loving Jesus, a wonderful husband, three healthy, beautiful, fabulous children, an unbelievably precious granddaughter, the greatest sister in the whole world, parents who loved me and supported me, friends from Flagler, Texline & Spearman who all left unique marks on me - shaped and influenced me in different ways and for whom I will be forever grateful, a church family in Allen who has taught, encouraged, loved, supported and challenged me through the hardest years of my life, my cute little red PT Cruiser - the only totally brand new car I've ever owned, a house that is always in the process of becoming what I want it to be, a sweet puppy dog who doesn't hold it against us that we neglect her terribly since Sophie came along, a job that pays me well, my talents of craftiness, my ability to sew, the Praise Team and that I belong to it, a pantry loaded with food and a grocery store near by, that I live in the United States and enjoy its freedoms in spite of its faults, girl's nights out with wonderful girlfriends, an unlimited amount of books to read, one of which is the Bible.

Well that wasn't at all hard and I could have kept going but at six minutes I called a halt. I'm truly blessed.

Challenge 4

Write a short message of thanks for some of the "negative" things in your life.

I looked ahead and saw this and have been dreading it - probably the reason I'm behind. It's just very hard right now to be thankful for things that are so hard. I've always said that Thomas losing his job was my biggest fear. Now here we are --- Thomas has lost his job. And it's every bit as scary as I thought it would be. Or is it? Actually, God has gone ahead of me every step of the way because I'm not nearly as panicked as I thought I would be. Of course it is still early in the game. But right now I'm very thankful that Thomas has been able to help out with Sophie and do some things around the house that have been neglected. Also just getting out of that poison atmosphere he was in is a huge blessing for him. So thank you for giving me peace in my worst fears and for providing for Sophie and Katie when they needed support the most.

Day Three about three days late

Write about something you feel grateful for in your life today.

Really. Should being grateful be so hard? Of course it shouldn't - I know that answer but when I sit at my desk and stare at a sentence and think to myself "My mind is completely blank." I realize I have a very large problem and it is me. Oh God, forgive me of my selfishness and the sins of looking past all the blessings as though they were nothing.

Today I am grateful for the gift of friendship. When I consider the number of dear close friends I have made over my lifetime I am completely humbled. God has so richly blessed me. In high school and college it was Liz - my conjoined twin. Seriously, we were NEVER apart. Ever. When we were in Bible college it was Becky. How much fun we had!! She and Jim were our singing buddies and we ended up traveling all over the country singing for things -- oh the precious memories. Sadly, neither one of us made it for the long haul with our spouses but I think we both say a rousing amen to "second time around is much better." Next came Jick & Rose in Flagler, CO. We spent so much time with them we practically lived together. Hours and hours of laughter and tears. Burying Jick at 28 years old was one of the hardest things we ever did. Our first experience with the enemy that is cancer. Next move brought us to Jerry and Rowena. Still some of the dearest friends I have ever had and am ever so much better a person for having met and loved them. Jerry taught me to laugh at myself and I needed that. I've posted about them before here so I won't say more. The next move brought many friends but dearest of all are Frank & Lucy. And of course, I've posted about them here. The next move brought me to the big city and so many experiences, changes, and friends. My current crop of friends have stood beside me in some of the darkest hours -- they've sat in the courtroom with me when my son was facing jail. They were at my door step within minutes of hearing that the ambulance was at my house and they were working on Daddy and it wasn't looking good. They were on their knees in tearful prayers as we prayed again and again for my son who was so lost. They helped me to find the joy in learning that I was to be a grandmother when no one was really ready. They have patiently listened to the many stories I now proudly tell about that grandbaby. I have friends at work who make work a safe place to be me. I have friends who will laugh with me, cry with me, share a drink with me, encourage me, chastise me, pray for me and play with me.

I say it again, Oh Lord, forgive me for not counting my blessings. Open my eyes to my narrow, tunnel-visioned self and create in me a thankful, grateful heart for the abundance of your gifts.