Thursday, January 08, 2009

Wealth and the lack thereof

Don't you just love the Word of God? No matter if you've been reading it all your life or are picking it up as a new baby Christian there is so much there. It never ceases to amaze me how I can read something that I've read hundreds of times before and all of a sudden I realize something has been added since the last time I read it! How could I have missed that all these years? Why haven't I seen that before? No matter how many times that happens I'm amazed every time.

The other morning I was reading in Mark and reading the Parable of the Sower. I have to discipline myself to really pay attention when I'm reading something I think I "already know". Then it happened! Again. I noticed that the seed that was sown among the thorns was choked out but it doesn't say it died. It says it didn't bear fruit. For some reason I had it in my head that the seed that was sown in the rocky soil died and the seed that was sown in the thorny soil died. I did a double take when I realized that was not what it said. Verse 7 says "Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants, so that they did not bear grain." Then to make sure they understand he explains in verses 18-19: "Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful."

That's when it became personal. The worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for things kept them from bearing fruit. Ouch. I struggle all the time with finding my security in my bank account. (Just to make it clear-my bank account will allow me approximately 32.5 hours of security.) It's why my stomach tightens and my arm pits sweat when I hear of lay-offs. It's what makes worry far too much. Oh I say with my mouth that God is in charge and He will take care of us. But my heart and my checkbook don't provide an amen to that assertion. I'm so ashamed of myself.

Dear Father please don't give up on me.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Happy New Year and other Randomness

Nothing says Happy New Year like a stomach virus. What a great way to ring in the New Year. Actually I think the optimum word would be "Wring" because wrung out is how I feel.

It's winter in Texas -- Saturday it was 82 degrees! Sunday it was 40. Yesterday we had an ice storm and today it's supposed to be in the 50's. You never know how to dress - it's advisable to keep a layer or two in your car just in case.

I'm trying to work up the determination to get back on the Weight Watcher's band wagon. I had an epiphany this weekend - I believe I'm convinced I really can't succeed. But I'm also pretty sure I'm not willing to fully commit. Am I stubborn? Afraid of failure? Or just psycho?

Our church is beginning the new year by reading Mark & John together. Sixty different people took one chapter and wrote a devotional thought to go with that particular chapter and then they were all compiled into a book. It's been very neat to read the words of people that I had no idea could write so well. In the fall we began a "program" for lack of a better word called "Masterpiece in the Making" which is what we all are. I began a personal plan with the start of the new year to look at each day's reading and answer three questions - 1) What is going on here? 2) What is God wanting to show me about me? and 3) What does God want me to know about Him? It's been a good way to look at the Word with fresh eyes.

I still haven't shared about the awesome Sunday of a few weeks past. I fully intend to. Changes are beginning to happen so fast that I'm mostly just hanging on for dear life. I'm going to need the prayers of every single person out there in Internet land to make it through the next year. I've been in the "I'll think about it tomorrow" mode and unfortunately, "tomorrow" is almost here. More on that next time.........