Sunday, September 23, 2007

Walking the tightrope

It has come as quite a big a surprise to me that having a child move to another state has been so painful. I remember driving away from the college campus in West Texas where we moved our oldest for his freshman year. I thought that was hard -- and it was. Somehow going to college doesn't feel quite as permanent as when a 21-year old moves out. The college experience provides you with a gradual letting go and maybe that's the difference. This was one day I'm fixing his dinner and next day I'm standing at the curb watching him drive away.

In case you are wondering I haven't been doing that great a job at that -- letting go. I'm trying. Really I am. But he reminded me the other day (and in not a very polite tone I might add) that he was a grown man and he didn't need to call his mother OR have his mother call him. He'd been calling me every day - giving me updates or asking what he should do about something involved in setting up house. And then one day in his mind he cut the cord........and didn't let me know. And I crossed that invisible line. He was not happy. And that made me mad. In a "I brought you into this world, young man and I can take you out!" Bill Cosby sort of way.

Which I have discovered, makes letting go easier for a time.

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